Essay 1, Accepting Small Talk

Mikhail Pukaniuk

ESL 100

October 25, 2026

Accepting Small Talk

Imagine a situation where I’m walking on the street with my friends or by myself, and some strangers stop me. I’m confused, and the thoughts in my brain are like, «Michael? Wait a second, what is going on?». I mean that I have no idea what I should expect from these guys who have just stopped me. Then I hear this phrase «What a beautiful day, right?». I answered, «I’m sorry, but do we know each other?» and then I heard, «Even though I don’t know you, it doesn’t mean that I can’t talk to you or say that this day is beautiful. You know what do I mean? Just be more open.» Of course, I was laughing at these guys by thinking that they are strange, but at that moment I hadn’t realized yet that there was only one strange person - me.

There is definitely a culture of small talk in the United States, and there is no doubt that I have to be a part of it. I would say I never realized how cool it is to start a conversation with some small talk. So, I have started accepting it by trying either to ask or to answer. Once, when I was in the grocery store, I found everything I wanted to buy, and then went to the cashier. She said, «Hello, sir! How are you today?». I have realized many times how was it stupid to answer. «Hey! I’m good! I just didn’t sleep well today. Anyway, I still feel good. Now I’m here to buy some products because I’m going to cook something delicious. And how are you? How is your day?». I remember her face was like a blank. I would even say she had a «poker face.» She answered, «All right, this is interesting, but you don’t have to talk about your whole life story.» I felt so uncomfortable. While I was on my way back home, I considered her words about ten times. When I finally got home, I realized that it was just a service, and she wanted to be polite. Right there I learned an important lesson that small talk is not always a way to start a huge conversation. It can also be something that helps you respect other people.

As a person who grew up in Russia, it might seem strange or unusual to have small talk in the United States because I’m not used to it. In Russia, people who I know usually just say «Hello» and their answers are often yes or no, which can seem rude to some Americans. But despite the fact that I’m not used to small talk, it is exactly what I have been looking for. It’s a way to be polite, to be respectful, and to avoid uncomfortable silence. I believe that everyone finds it helpful. However for me the most helpful benefit of small talk is to be always open for conversation and take away my lack of confidence. I really enjoy the way people communicate here in the United States. It feels like I don’t have to create an interesting sentence or key to unlock a conversation. I can always be accepted by society and be surrounded by people who want to have a good conversation about literally nothing.

Since I realized this important lesson that is called small talk, I have started noticing how my life is changing for the better. Adapting to the United States has become much easier just because of small talk. It might seem simple, but actually it has a deep influence on my life. I don’t feel a lack of confidence anymore because I can always talk with strangers about the weather or just ask, «How is it going?» with an understanding that everything will be okay. I’m so glad to be a part of this culture.